Be careful what you wish for...

It's been a long time since we last spoke.  You'll be detecting that my heart seems no longer to be in weekly blogging.

You're right.

Don't know why and can't explain it.  Sometimes the mojo just isn't with you and I no longer feel compelled to write every monday.

Sorry.  No promises but I'll think about getting back to it on a more regular basis.

Thinking about it, it may well be due to my desire, at the beginning of the season, to make this year's Ironman training more relaxed than previous years'.   I dispensed with my coach, exchewed my Garmin and trained more on feel than stats.  And, I have to say I enjoyed that very much.  I also wanted to delay my fitness peak as I believe that in my last two Ironman races, I'd been peaking around mid June time.   With this race not happening until the end of July, I felt no urgency to get super fit, super quick, relying on the drip drip drip of steady improvement.

How does the saying go; 'be careful what you wish for, it might just come true'?  Something like that, anyway.  Well, it appears to be the case in my situation.  My fitness is certainly being delayed.  Not due to a training regime, but due to the lack of it.

I've been battling an achilles injury for the best part of  the year now.  It started in february and was with me a month or so before stretches and calf-strengthening sidelined it.  It returned, however, in late March and - being the dullard that I am - I kept trying to run on it to 'test it'.

Doh - it didn't need 'testing' - it was telling me there was a  problem.  Three weeks ago, things reached a head when, following a four day, 300 mile cycling trip to the Peak District with some Team MK buddies, I tried to run once again.  After a couple of miles the achilles tightened dramatically and began to give me a  huge amount of pain.  I was forced to hobble in and take stock.

It's taken three weeks to show any sign of improvement and only now am I beginning to be able to walk without pain.   The thought of even jogging is a long way off but at least with the recent improvement I've seen I can see some light at the end of the tunnel whereas for the past three weeks I've been in a bit of a dark place.

All this got me thinking about the insular nature of our worlds.   Isn't it the case that everything orbits our 'world', with it taking an almost superhuman effort to see things from the edge of the galaxy that contains us.  There I am feeling like it's the end of my world when all I have is a tight achilles.  People are dying and suffering the most awful diseases and tribulations yet here's me, with all my relative riches ('life' riches rather than monetary riches) feeling glum about a self inflicted sporting injury.  What wouldn't those with real problems give to exchange places with me?

Frankly, I feel ashamed of my behaviour at times and it's a humbling and strengthening exercise to force oneself out of one's bubble now and then and see your problems from another's perspective.  Things are never as bad as they seem.

I've cancelled all my races up to Ironman Switzerland.  These included Grendon Sprint, Marshman Half IM, Bala Middle and The European Championships in Ireland.  Needs must.  I have only one 'A' race and if I can take part I want to, even if it means doing so relatively unfit and having to walk the marathon.

I'll keep you posted but if you hear me whinging, prod me and tell me to stop being a morose f***er.

Photos this week are, as my girls would say, random.  My new Cervelo R3 road bike, Erin and Alice, me after climbing Winnats Pass in The Peak District, the dreaded achilles when taped up.

I'm sure we have much family news but it's been so long that I'll limit it to this.  We are all well.  The girls are healthy.  Fiona is still my wife.  The weather is wonderful.

We are blessed to be here.  So lucky to be just passing through.  Even a sore achilles can't dull my underlying love of life and sense of joy at the wonder of it all.

I hope you are all well and your problems are tiny ones.